How to Find & Return to Your First Love
If you’ve been thinking about your first love and want to try to locate him or her, the Internet can be a great help in finding them. No matter how many years have passed since you last saw them, there is likely a virtual fingerprint they’ve left somewhere along the way.
Searching for Someone Online
There are a plethora of public records available online as well as social media accounts that all leave a trail of where someone has been in life. Perhaps the first step in searching for your lost love, especially if you may have mutual friends, is to search for them on your social media accounts. If you find them there, you’ll often be able to view some photos and a little about their personal life. Many will offer marital status information, children and even place of residence and work. Of course, photos of their wedding or recent birth of a child can also give you clues, too!
Public records can offer information such as marriage certificates, divorce decrees, property records, current legal addresses, business ownership, and even tax information. You can determine whether they are currently married, or even how many properties they own and pay taxes on. They may also own a business in your area, or have tax liens filed against them.
What Information Do You Need to Help Find Them?
If you’re certain you have mutual friends with your first love, ask if they may have a mailing address for them. It might be in your best interest to determine where in the world they’re located first – if they’re in Antarctica for research indefinitely, you may change your mind about how badly you want to find them.
When you’re starting your search, you need to know your first love’s legal full name. If you’re searching for a woman, you must consider the fact she may have married and changed her surname at some point, so more detective work will be necessary to track her down.
Of course, anyone can legally change their name after reaching adulthood, so if your first love decided to escape their life and redefine themselves, they could be named anything. The only thing that can put you on the right path is finding the legal record where they changed their name.
What to Do Before Contacting Them
After you’ve done your due diligence, check yourself and your intentions. If you truly wish to rekindle your romance with your first love, avoid coming out and saying that – just take it slow and reach out to them like an old friend. Sending a note that says you’d like to chat or reconnect and giving them your contact information leaves them in the driver’s seat. Another option is a private message through your social media account. Phone calls are suggested only after receiving a positive response from your ex-love. Catching them off guard with a call they weren’t expecting could leave the conversation strained, regardless of whether they still think of you fondly.
Start thinking about your reasons for returning to your first love – are you fresh out of a relationship and just being nostalgic? Or do you truly miss their values, opinions, and company? Give yourself a reality check if your first love was from many, many decades ago, too. If you were very young, there’s almost nothing you’re likely to still have in common anymore. And remember that if that much time has passed they aren’t going to look like the strapping 16-year-old hunk you knew and loved them!
If you simply just have a strong gut feeling you should reach out to them, or you know you left them with unfinished business, it may be worth a try to find them. Always thinking of them when you were with other people, or knowing you both needed to grow and mature when you split up are also signs that finding them might be a good idea for your mental well-being.
Just make sure you give yourself a reality check and prepare for the possibility you could be rejected, too! Relationships work both ways, and this means that either one of you may decide you feel differently about the other!