The world is full of broken families these days, and many kids grow up in a single-parent household. If you have never met your mother or father or lost touch with one of your parents and would like to reconnect, there are ways you can try to find them, reach out, and start a new relationship.
Reasons to Reach Out to an Absentee Parent
Although the process of finding a loved one is not complicated, it can bring up painful or difficult emotions. Before embarking on this journey, decide what you hope to get out of it and why you are trying to locate them.
If you grew up without a mother or father in the picture and you just want to see where you come from, that makes perfect sense.
Some other reasons why people try to locate their parents later in life are medical reasons (they need a kidney, special blood type, or DNA) or because of some type of life-threatening illness.
It’s possible that your missing parent went on to get married and have other children as well. You may have brothers and sisters you don’t even know about. Filling in those missing biological links can be healing for some people.
Perhaps you just want to confront your parent about why they abandoned you, and you are entitled to some answers. Regardless of why you want to find your absentee parent, there are ways to do it.
How to Find Birth Parents with Little Information?
There are multiple ways to locate a missing parent. Thankfully the internet has provided various gateways for information and offers quick and easy results. Some helpful ways to find a lost relative are:
One way you can try to find a missing parent is to sign up for a genealogy website and fill out all the pieces of the family tree. You may need to gather a lot of information about different members of the family, and it might take time, but it might lead you to relatives you didn’t know you had and, in the end finding that parent you want to reconnect with.
You can also order a DNA kit pretty easily. With a quick swab, you can send in your DNA and have it matched with someone else’s. If your parent’s DNA is in one of the various databases, you could connect that way as well, and you would have proof that they are your biological parent.
Social media is always an option. You might want to post a message to your family and friends that you are searching for a specific someone and see if anyone offers up information. Once you connect to someone who knows or knew them, you can ask questions, reach out to others and find them that way. You can also perform searches based on their name, date of birth, hometown and other details you have about them. You might get lucky and can message them to see if they want to start a conversation. Facebook and Twitter are two great options for reconnecting with family.
Background Check Tool
Another fantastic way to find someone online is using a background check tool like InfoTracer to find anyone. You start by entering his or her name and date of birth and see what comes up. You can then get an entire report including details of prior addresses, aliases, relatives, phone numbers, email accounts, social media accounts, court records, criminal records, and more. You might find out all about your lost parent before you even reach out to them.
Once You Find Them, Now What?
Not everyone wants to be found. Therefore, if you go looking for a parent that you haven’t seen in many years, do not expect that they will welcome you with open arms. They may be delighted to forge a new relationship with you, but they might not. You cannot predict how someone will react in this type of situation. If they have an entire other family who knows nothing about you, they might be reluctant to rock the boat.
Start small with a quick email or message and see how things go. Take it slow and let them get used to the idea. They have lived a lot of years without you in their life, so this might bring up difficult emotions for them. Try to be patient and understanding. In the end, things will pan out the way they were meant to. Don’t force a relationship if they don’t want it. You can at least walk away knowing that you made an effort and were able to locate your long-lost parent.
Hopefully, your parent will be happy you took the time to find them. In some cases, it might be the best thing that has happened to both of you.